The Masters' Gallery of Singular Equipment

Category: Pet
Inescapable gaze make you nervous. Inescapable kiss make you suffocates and then dead. Not that you have to endure all of it yourself…
+10 Dangerous, +2 Scandal, +2 Wound

Rattus Faber Spy-Secretary
Category: Pet
Handy for the occasion when you are not allowed to bring notebook.
+2 Watchful

Clockwork Miniature Sardonic Music-Hall Singer
Category: Pet
She dispense real acid. Not close enough to the characteristic vitrol the real one is know for, but it gets the job done.
+2 Dangerous, +1 Dreaded

Ratwork Venom-Ruby Derringer
Category: Weapon
“What do you mean, it is not fashionable enough?
+5 Dangerous, + 3 Persuasive, +5 Wound, +2 Suspicion

Personal Rattus Faber Cavalry Bodyguard Platoon
Category: Affiliation
Cost more cheese than a Cheesemonger’s stock. Provides enough protection for a Cheesemonger, her family member and all operatives under her.
-4 Persuasive, +4 Dangerous, +4 Dreaded

The Neathy Titanic
Category: Ship
Very likely to turn your crew into a bunch of incompetent idiots, crash into a Mountain of the Unterzee, and then sink magnificently. But you will be the marvel of society and the whole of Fallen London!
+8 Respectable, +7 Troubled Water, -1 Explorer of Unterzee

Okay, the Oversatyr is my favourite thing since the suggestion that late-stage Seeking the Name might involve turning one’s pet into Over Rogan Josh.

Personally, my favourite is the Neathy Titanic.

The miniature music-singer dispensing acid made me snort a laugh, I confess.

Category: Curiosity
They say it is given to all friends of Mr Chimes. They say it can grow a new page when Mr Chimes will it. They say if your name is written on it, Mr Chimes will be your owner for eternity.

Mr Apple’s Lodging Security Deluxe!
Category: Home Comfort
Dealing with thieves is not that different from dealing with rats. Keep it out of reach of monkeys, urchins and guests.

Moderately-Dauntless Temperance Campaigner
Category: Constant Companion
Moderately formidable, moderately admired for her obstruction of wanton consumption of wine of others. Not formidable enough to prevent you from consuming wine, luckily.
-2 Scandal, +1 Respectable

Uncomfortable Intriguer
Category: Constant Companion
A face-stealing spy who, when you’re alone, grows tentacles, bandages, rat ears and teeth, a hood, goat horns, and assorted things to your desire. It is all yours, and it hate your horrible tastes and inconsiderateness.
+3 Heartless, +5 Hedonist, +5 Forceful

Aggravating Alligator
Category: Pet
“Yes, I know I am unlucky! I know I can’t make more waves! Stop nagging me, d___ you! Ouch! D___ your ____ and ____! Ow!”
+5 Melancholy, +5 Dangerous, +7 Wounds, +7 Nightmare

Clay Man Butler-Barber-Butcher
Category: Pet
edited by Byron Man on 5/29/2012

Tome of Improbable Forbidden Knowledge
Watchful +3, Dreaded +1, Bizarre +1, Nightmares +2
Surely that cannot…should not be!

Byron, I think you win this thread. XD

I wish I did. But the Hooded Paramour kinds of made sure I don’t.

Honeyed Darkdrop Latte
Category: Curiosity

The pinnacle of counterintuition - a sip merely cause one to alternate between dreams and reality in rapid succession complete with the nasty jolt of awakening each second.

Immolating Gossip
Category: Weapon

“Mysteries are fire. Truth burns. Here, let me light your cigar.”

Patent Scruntizer Custom .7
Category: Weapon

Known to criminals as a powerful weapon taken from a formidable foe. Known to the rest of the world as the proof of a villain bullying old lady.
+5 Watchful, -5 Persuasive, +5 Scandal

Morelways 1861 Extra Dry
Category: Wine

“Come quickly, someone is mummified drinking this!”

St.Meliflua’s Teaspoon
Category: Infernal

A prized relic of the patron saint of devils. Forgotten by Hell and Church alike. Stir your tea with this to save money on sugar.

100 Neathy Classic Tales for Children
Category: Curiosity

Contains entertaining, educational and ethical stories such as “Counting with Chimes”, “Mr Sacks sacks naughty urchins”, and the all-time favourite “Mr Names kill Name-seekers”!

Saving Christmas: The Complete Collection
Category: Contraband

A family favorite with tales of various moral ladies from Sinning Jenny to some nobodies named “Alice” and “Catherine” rescuing and solving troubles for Mr Sacks.
Mr Pages insists this is a “improofing and educationary heartheating gatherion of stories”. Mr Sacks insists this is a “villainous plot of revolutionaries to slander and humiliate”.

Your “Creativity” quality has gone!
Enjoying the atmosphere of The Masters’ Gallery is increasing…

Nice pictures, though I have to agree the Hooded Paramour does cost you a few points.

Singing Amber

Category: Rubbery

It keeps singing “Pop Goes The Weasel”, and attracts a whole horde of Rubbery Men to shadow you. Maybe you should give it to them? (But it is so pretty!)

Category: Weapon

Neither an urchin nor zee-food. Don’t let a Rubbery Man catch you walking around with this.

Drop of Executioner’s Honey
Category: Contraband

Named “the King of Honey”, they say, for its taste is second to none, not even to Gaoler’s Honey. What they don’t say is that it is also second to none in lethality, not even to Cantigaster Venom. Hence, the name.

Category: Pet

Adorable urchin, exalted assassin and assistant, whatever. She exceeds all your expectations of what an Adopted-ish Daughter should be, anyway. Speaking of which, have you seen your daughter lately?
+2 Dangerous, +4 Persuasive, +1 Watchful, +1 Shadowy

Albino Salt-Chimera
Category: Pet

Just because you found the Albino Rat and Salt Weasel look similar is no excuse to fuse them together, you horrible person!
+4 Dreaded, +1 Nightmare

I want a Filly-Fatale now. May I ask what you use to edit the photos?

GIMP. The Fille-Fatale is made by cruelly removing the bun on the Oriential lady’s head, fattening said lady, and adding two ponytails.
edited by Byron Man on 6/2/2012

Silasilent’s Gothic Romance Collection
Category: Weapon
Just looking at it the 12 volume set gets your blood rushing. Reading it makes you ready to take to the streets and defend love. At all costs.
+3 Dangerous, +3 Persuasive, -3 Shadowy

Hah! I love it.

Hah! I love it.[/quote]


My personal take on an extensive collection of scientific discovery works ^^ (in my idea, each represents 10 or more volumes of the relevant scientific collated works):

De lapsis civitatibus libri
A poetic rendition of the history of the five Fallen Cities, based on myths and archaeological discoveries in the Southern Archipelago and Polythreme. And all in Latin to boot! For the gentleman and the scholar.
+3 Watchful, +3 Persuasive, +1 Respectable
(Prelapsarian Archaeology)

Category: Weapon
Arcane bestiary
Know your enemy… Or your pet.
+3 Watchful, +3 Dangerous, +1 Dreaded

Category: Weapon
The alphabet of lost souls
The complete guide for the explorer of what’s Beyond.
+3 Watchful, +3 Shadowy, +1 Bizarre

Category: Clothing
Inquisitive Covert*
A coat which bears the rigors of investigation. [b][b]
+3 Watchful, +1 Dangerous, +1 Respectable, +1 Dreaded

[/b][/b]*Charcoal Covert? Correspondent Overcoat?[b][b]


I see all of these as part of an “Inspired” Series or something, where the higher you build it and the more you put into it, the greater the reward. It would involved a revolutionary dying engineer who enlists your help for one last masterpiece before he dies. I’m not sure the order however

Category: Weapon
Water-Cooled Multi-rifle
Now you to can put as many bullets in the air as a squad of the Empress’s finest guardsmen! Now if only it wasn’t so d**ned loud…
+5 Dangerous, +1 Dreaded, -4 Watchful

Category: Clothing
Clockwork Dueling Suit
You spent the evenings designing it, you paid handsomely for it to be built, and they laugh at you? Let us see who laughs now!
+4 Dangerous, -3 Stealth, +2 Scandal, -2 Wounds, +2 Bizarre, +1 Dreaded

Category: Shoes
Wheeled Boots
They’re like velocipedes you wear on your feet! How Novel!
+2 Stealth, +1 Bizarre +2 Respectable

Category: Pet
A Clockwork in Constant Motion
Every time you see this you can’t help but be struck by wonder as it’s existence
+3 Bizarre, +2 Persuade, +2 Dangerous, -1 Stealth, +3 Watchful

Category: Gloves
Clock-Work Climbers
Gloves fit to give the greatest of grips whether hanging from a perlious cliff or providing a firm grip on the hand of your father-in-law to-be!
+2 Dangerous, +1 Stealth

and now for something completely unrelated:

Category: Clothing
Flaming Suit
They can’t catch you IF YOU’RE ON FIRE!
+2 Dangerous, +3 Wounds, -3 Suspicion, +2 Bizarre, +1 Dreaded

Ok, that’s it for now. Thoughts?
edited by Swordude on 7/16/2012
edited by Swordude on 7/16/2012

and now for something completely unrelated:

Category: Clothing
Flaming Suit
They can’t catch you IF YOU’RE ON FIRE!
+2 Dangerous, +3 Wounds, -3 Suspicion, +2 Bizarre, +1 Dreaded

Ok, that’s it for now. Thoughts?
edited by Swordude on 7/16/2012
edited by Swordude on 7/16/2012[/quote]

This sounds dangerously similar to something Red Mage from 8 Bit Theatre could come up with :)

A Drop of Moon-Milk

Not enough to damage their mind permanently, of course. Just enough to stoke the flames of love. [This will allow you to skip the steps of courting a Constant Companion, taking you straight to the final step.]

Correspondence-Engraved Goggles

“Look deep into my eyes, and you’ll see my love for y-somebody get some water!

+3 Dangerous, +2 Suspicion, +2 Scandal, -2 Shadowy, -2 Perusasive

Mr.Eaten’s Name

Engraved on a small square of lead, just thinking about looking at it causes you to foam at the mouth. [This item cannot be removed once equipped, but will reveal to you the Name. Why would you do this? For the love of all that is holy, put it down!]

+7 Scandal, +7 Wounds, +7 Nightmares, +7 Suspicion, -5 Shadowy, -5 Dangerous, -5 Persuasive, -5 Watchful
edited by Twoflower on 7/21/2012