The Season of Ratmas returns!

As the season turns to winter, one of its undeniable rites returns. It is the Season of Ratmas again

It’s December, and that means soon it will be time for Ratmas again. Ratmas is an annual holiday within the Fallen London community, occurring on the 7th of December, where the community sends rats to staff members at Failbetter Games.

See The Ratmas Primer for more info on this holiday.


This year there were no new staff members, so instead the elected targets are Jim and Hannah. They can be reached at the following postal address:

Jim: Fallen London

Hannah: Fallen London

Also officially accepting rats are:

George: Fallen London

Luke: Fallen London

Stuart: Fallen London

The rest of Failbetter Games have conspired to keep their accounts hidden, but any found are also fair game.

Ratmas: A Cheery contest

To encourage good cheer and sportsmanship among all, Mr. Ratmas will give one box of 20 Fate to whoever sends the best accompanying message (please keep it civil).

Entries can be submitted by posting them as a comment to this thread, or by DM’ing me on Discord (asarta). Please make sure to include the name of the character you want to receive the Fate; entries without a name will be discarded.

Entries will only be considered if submitted before 21 December, 23:59 UTC.


Thanks for putting this up! For a history lesson, check the old (very old) post from the forum: Search results for 'ratmas' - The Failbetter Games Forums

Now all I need is to wait for the card after discarding it by accident yesterday…

EDIT: Well, i just pin pointed people to older threads for… stauff!
And I love how Hannah is ready and waiting! :smiley:

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God rat ye Merry gentlerats

Let no rats ye dismay

Remember all that Spacemarine

Sent rats on Ratmas Day

To give to Devs the rat’s power

When they were all sent rats

Oh tidings of Ra-a-ats and joy

Rats and joy

Oh tidings of Ra-a-ats and joy!

In London, in The Neath

These blessed rats was born

And laid within a box

Upon this ratted morn

That which the postal system

Did no rats take in scorn

Oh tidings of Ra-a-ats and joy

Rats and joy

Oh tidings of Ra-a-ats and joy!

Fear not then, said the rats

Let no rats you affright

This day is born many rats

Of a pure Judgement White

To save all those who trust in rats

From Hell’s pow’r and might

Oh tidings of Ra-a-ats and joy

Rats and joy

Oh tidings of Ra-a-ats and joy


The name’s John Schmit, no underscore, I’ll be here all week.

EDIT: and of course the one I sent a bit after that due to me happily drawing the gift card again:
“My apologies, I’m currently on my lunch break so I can’t rewrite another song for this package”


A standing ovation for John Schmit!


My submission to the compitetion is 'Rats to staff at Fail Better Games. and POP goes the weasel" my IGN is also SuperHGB, and that’s who I want to receive the fate

My favorite so far:

Deck the halls with Rattus Faber
(Squeak-a-squeak-a-squeak, a-squeak, squeak, squeak)
Send a Rattus to thy neighbor
(Squeak-a-squeak-a-squeak, a-squeak, squeak, squeak)
Ratmas brings unending rodents
(Squeak-a-squeak, squeak-a-squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak)
Glory rats may be explodents
(Squeak-a-squeak-a-squeak, a-squeak, squeak, squeak)



With apologies for the double-post:

Mr Treats! Mr Treats!
What a lucky find!
His devices always work
Exactly as desiiii-igned!
Mr Treats! Mr Treats!
Ratwork gifts abound!
We wish his Emporium
Were open all year round!

Dashing through the streets
Feeling some remorse
Why’d I spend that Fate
On this untamed horse?
Cannot catch my breath
Through the twists and turns
Wish I’d listened when he said
“No refunds, no returns!”

Mr Treats! Mr Treats!
Creature most unkind!
His devices never work
Exactly as desiiii-igned!
Mr Treats! Mr Treats!
B----y rodent scum!
I wish I had never seen
His d----d Emporium!



One does hate to be demanding, but will there be any news as to who won? After all, Christmas already happened and I still don’t know what the best rat-themed joke was.

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I apologise; life put a lot of strain on me suddenly this last month. I’ve posted results and honourable mentions over on Reddit.