Calling anyone who might be interested in playtesting a new game entitled “The Castle On The Hill.” It is a game of discovery and unlocking the mysteries of a world seemingly cut off from all others.
Play the part of a trapped soul wandering the world’s areas in the chance of escape.
I would love to hear thoughts and reviews of the game and the game play.
NOTE: There are tokens available for playtesting to refresh Actions. Please email me at ferguson4848@gmail.com and I will send you the link to retrieve the token.
Please let me know if you experience a problem with running out too quickly.
Thank you. edited by ferguson4848 on 9/7/2013 edited by ferguson4848 on 9/11/2013
Well, I tried. I stood in the field, peered to the North - where else? ;) - found myself beside the River, tried to turn back, fell in and drowned.
I will try again, but this first experience was mostly startling and rather short…
EDIT:
Okay, I played a second time. Generally speaking I liked the setting. I explored the forest, the castle and the cabin. What you’ve created so far is solely exploratory right? Once again I drowned in the river and the game ended - an experience I really don’t care for. ;)
One word to your descriptions. There’s some tense confusion going on. You often switch between past and present. Also, I would advise you to get someone to proofread your descriptions. :D
Should you write more, I look forward to explore more… edited by SeriesFive on 9/7/2013
Thanks so much for taking the time to have a look. I’ve changed the river situation so there is a way out before drowning now. I guess I hadn’t thought that through :)
As for the rest of the game, there is more than just exploring or at least that was the idea. There are several objects you can pick up and then be able to use those objects throughout the game to unlock more clues or areas.
I think I have similar tendencies to SeriesFive. If attempt to cross is an option, I’ll damn well try. And try. If ‘being able to cross’ is not in yet - is there any way, after a few attempts at crossing, you can declare (in a context appropriate voice) that crossing the river is not possible, yet? Used out most my actions trying to cross the river, so only explored there and a bit of the forest before ran out. May try again later.
Tree branch - 22nex - for that I’d expect a massive chunk of story. As a player, since you’re not FallenLondon, I’d be unlikely to commit more than 2 or 3 nex to a StoryNexus game, unless I was REALLY familiar with the world (so this would have to appear much later, and be a massive world). Putting this high a number would only ensure I don’t even think about exploring that option. (But maybe that’s the point.)
[i]edited by babelfishwars on 9/8/2013
I had a try. I am not very good at these kind of games because I always forget where things are, so when your actions are limited that can make it frustrating. I burned through the actions very fast. But it has an interesting atmosphere!
I’m stuck. I managed to get as far as the well but now I’m back in the Trees - have three options - right left and back. Have tried all my items on each choice. Two items, knife and gear, do nothing and using the shovel leads nowhere.
Even clicking back just gives the same three options and the text says - "Walk You turn directly around and start off into the trees" I’m trying to get out of the trees!
I think the issue with the forest is it doesn’t obey its own directions.
E.g. I can get to the cliff by going forward. I turn around and march back into the marshes. I go forward, and I am back at the cliff. So I haven’t actually turned around. Unless there’s a cliff in front of and behind me.
Back doesn’t make sense in that context, either.
Would be a very frustrating area with limited turns, as you might forget where you’d been before, and thus keep repeating the same directions over and over. edited by babelfishwars on 9/8/2013
That makes sense about the nex. For the time being I just took the cost off.
Well as for the river I hate to be the barer of bad news, but there isnt anything over the river. But it is really just how to get an item.
Once you have the item the crossing isnt an option any more.
[quote=babelfishwars]I think I have similar tendencies to SeriesFive. If attempt to cross is an option, I’ll damn well try. And try. If ‘being able to cross’ is not in yet - is there any way, after a few attempts at crossing, you can declare (in a context appropriate voice) that crossing the river is not possible, yet? Used out most my actions trying to cross the river, so only explored there and a bit of the forest before ran out. May try again later.
Tree branch - 22nex - for that I’d expect a massive chunk of story. As a player, since you’re not FallenLondon, I’d be unlikely to commit more than 2 or 3 nex to a StoryNexus game, unless I was REALLY familiar with the world (so this would have to appear much later, and be a massive world). Putting this high a number would only ensure I don’t even think about exploring that option. (But maybe that’s the point.)
[i]edited by babelfishwars on 9/8/2013
Well. I obtained a rope and a rock and a gear, and I found a lead pipe that I couldn’t do anything with. Then I ran out of turns.
My comment is that there seems to be a lot of needless movement. I wish I could have gotten more of the actual story in 30 turns so I would be compelled to come back after they refreshed. The prose is pretty sparse, especially in some of your locations where you need to do the same thing several times to make something happen. It feels like a straightforward "search for objects in this adventure game and use them somewhere else to search for more objects" type of story. Other than that I don’t know anything. I wish there was a hook in all the "left/right/forward/back/go to the well/go to the river" – some story meat to induce readers to come back.
Some typos:
The Beginning: "Presumable the blue of the sky" - Presumably?
The field "wide greed field stretches out for several dozen yards" - green field? Several dozen - so the fields end after several football fields?
The well: "A wooden pole mounted horizontal" horizontally?[li] edited by HanonO on 9/8/2013
[quote=ferguson4848]That makes sense about the nex. For the time being I just took the cost off.
Well as for the river I hate to be the barer of bad news, but there isnt anything over the river. But it is really just how to get an item.
Once you have the item the crossing isnt an option any more.[/quote]
Perhaps have a storylet after you fail at crossing and have the rope such that you look at the river, see it’ll be too fast flowing for you ever to swim, and then add a quality which means the river crossing option is no longer available - you can only look at it (or something)?
[quote=babelfishwars][quote=ferguson4848]That makes sense about the nex. For the time being I just took the cost off.
Well as for the river I hate to be the barer of bad news, but there isnt anything over the river. But it is really just how to get an item.
Once you have the item the crossing isnt an option any more.[/quote]
Perhaps have a storylet after you fail at crossing and have the rope such that you look at the river, see it’ll be too fast flowing for you ever to swim, and then add a quality which means the river crossing option is no longer available - you can only look at it (or something)?[/quote]
[quote=babelfishwars]I think the issue with the forest is it doesn’t obey its own directions.
E.g. I can get to the cliff by going forward. I turn around and march back into the marshes. I go forward, and I am back at the cliff. So I haven’t actually turned around. Unless there’s a cliff in front of and behind me.
Back doesn’t make sense in that context, either.
Would be a very frustrating area with limited turns, as you might forget where you’d been before, and thus keep repeating the same directions over and over. edited by babelfishwars on 9/8/2013[/quote]
Okay, the orientation when you came back into the forest from the cliff or the river has been fixed.
Hmm … still no idea how to get out of the forest. I’ve gone ‘back’ a lot, no joy. Even found the tree once.
Got the rock. It unlocks an unfinished storylet? Check the trees - doesn’t do anything when I click the button: …
HOWEVER, the number changing on the tree as you move around does help - I found a new area.
Edit:
And a map. HURRAH. Taking ages to load. How did you get it to load in the screen, and not be a link to a new page? (Didn’t know you could use your own images at all. Can you embed other things - videos and so on?) ANyway - makes a MASSIVE difference to finding your way around.
[i]edited by babelfishwars on 9/8/2013
Ran out of turns shortly after getting the map, but think it might make the forest a lot less frustrating. Is there any way you can prevent someone venturing too far in before they find it?
[/i]
[i]edited by babelfishwars on 9/8/2013
Even with the map I can’t seem to get to the well. But I can get out, which is good.
[/i]
[i]edited by babelfishwars on 9/9/2013
I got to the river via the cabin, tried to cross (again!), and now I’m stuck with no cards to click on at all.
[/i] edited by babelfishwars on 9/9/2013
I got to the river via the cabin, tried to cross (again!), and now I’m stuck with no cards to click on at all.
[/i] edited by babelfishwars on 9/9/2013[/quote]
Sorry about that, I had made a change and sort of forgot about that little branch. However, if you log back in you should be in a storylet. If not, let me know and maybe I can change one of your qualites via the debug.
I got to the river via the cabin, tried to cross (again!), and now I’m stuck with no cards to click on at all.
[/i] edited by babelfishwars on 9/9/2013[/quote]
Sorry about that, I had made a change and sort of forgot about that little branch. However, if you log back in you should be in a storylet. If not, let me know and maybe I can change one of your qualites via the debug.
I have been writing a ‘diary’ of sorts that belongs to a woman who was one of the last people to live at the castle. My thought was to have a player find the diary and then ‘unlock’ chapters as they played through different areas of the game. There would also be clues to how to where things were hidden and ultimately how to get out.
Does this seem like a good way to handle this or should I just give the player the diary in full when they find it.
Annoyed: I relied on your comment that ‘there is a token to refresh actions for playtesting’ and found that I had spent 10 NEX without intending to :-(. Grrr.
I am so sorry about that, I now see that was confusing. What I meant was I could make tokens available to playtesters upon request.
If you would like I can give you several tokens for this purpose. Please email me your character name and I will do this right away. Email me at ferguson4848@gmail.com