A-w-k-w-a-r-d… I thought I saw you there, the guy with the stashed-away kitten? But then, I’m not sure of everything I ‘remember’ from that night.
Is it possible you went to some other party and I just thought you were there? I do get confused by new faces and names when I’ve been indulging the green fairy…
edited by SilvaTomorrow on 6/7/2019
[color=#009900]- Faber Rats - [/color]
In my mind, if nowhere else, I need to conquer the ship, room by room, region by region. Drive the enemy to a defense of territory, lock them into their territory, and then crush them! These LB’s picked the wrong steamer!
I have hired a weasel-trainer named Joseph, called Yoseffy, and his contingent of 12 fighting weasels. Their job will be to ‘occupy’ transitional zones between our living areas and the freight access stairs and hatches. My starveling cat had already been installed in the engine room, as seemed appropriate.
In the meantime, Zed, Leahn, and myself have been concentrating on the security of our own quarters and securing foodstuffs and other supplies the LB’s will want. Otherwise, I am still wracking my brains for an effective approach to eradicating this menace AND prevent future incursions - without bankrupting myself or burning my boat to the waterline.
EDIT: Urchins could help.
edited by SilvaTomorrow on 6/7/2019
OOC: Unplugged for a few days - romantic weekend escape!
[color=#009900] - Preparing for the Long Term - [/color]
Dottore Rappacini can poison the cargo areas - but his price for that large an area is more than I paid for the steamer. I have instead be talking to (my contact at) SmokeyBean & Co, and I may have a more cost effective solution of similar nature.
In the meantime, I have brought Bert, Mr Davies, onboard. He’s a local lad who will be serving as ship’s lookout. His job will to be to mark any rats moving to or from the steamer, via boat(?!) or swimming, and to also thoroughly explore the various areas of the steamer, tracking areas occupied by the LBs, as well as marking their usual routes and ongoing activity. He is not to engage the enemy, but to observe and report. He seems confident that he contribute decisively to our efforts. Bert is an alert and industrious lad, and I share his confidence.
Skirmishes have begun! At the suggestion of the Department of Menace Eradication, the first seven dead LBs were not disposed of or eaten, but delivered to LB territory. They disappeared rather quickly afterwards.
EDIT: Mr Davies has reported finding evidences that the starveling cat and the fighting weasels have also already begun engaging the enemy successfully. 
EDIT 2: What does L.B. stand for anyway? Anyone, anyone?
EDIT 3: Maybe this will help in my fight against the rats - I am now a person of some little consequence. hmm.
edited by SilvaTomorrow on 6/11/2019
[quote=SilvaTomorrow][color=#009900] <snip>[/color]
EDIT 2: What does L.B. stand for anyway? Anyone, anyone?
<snip>
edited by SilvaTomorrow on 6/11/2019[/quote]
"Little Bastards".
[quote=Catherine Raymond][color=#009900] [/color]
"Little Bastards". [/quote]
Makes sense, both figuratively and literally…
edited by SilvaTomorrow on 6/12/2019
[color=#009900] - Paying the Price - [/color]
The LBs have sent Venge-rats creeping into our areas late at night, have made several sorties from which we must always fall back, and then retake whatever areas. Everyone’s picked up a few wounds (even Leahn) and is short on sleep. They keep making their damned holes in my steamer! Three fighting weasels have been killed - I had to buy all twelve, but the Joseph is still returning daily to work with the remaining nine, plus my own.
I’ve added another urchin, or I should say, Bert recruited a friend, Sly, who is a bit younger, but helps Bert span the shifts as "assistant lookout". We (Bert and Sly) continue the practice of returning any corpses the LBs can’t take back themselves - I envision a time when we will come to negotiations, and hope it will help. I mean to present the LBs with the illusion that I can outlast them… Also, a little later today, while most of them are sleeping we plan a major chemical offensive. My friend at SmokeyBean has a concoction which should make all the lower areas of the ship unbearable for 2-3 days. As I write, we are about to pull the starveling cat and the fighting weasels from their positions.
edited by SilvaTomorrow on 6/12/2019
[color=#009900] - An Unexpected Party -[/color]
Do we learn from mistakes? - That was rhetorical. Anyway we got these barrels from SmokeyBean, and gas masks. The urchins put the gas masks on right away and through the whole process kept turning to us and saying, "Are you my mummy?". It was weird, but I’ve been on the outside of inside jokes before, so, whatever.
The ‘attack’ went as planned - the LBs had no idea what we were up to until they started choking on brown fumes. It had an immediate effect on them, with some of them lying down and others weaving drunkenly when they walked. We retreated to the upper decks and took off our masks. There was an odd (rubber-glue + dead fish, tinged with licorice) smell, but not strong where we were. Per instructions, we all went ashore for a long lunch.
We returned to a hideous noise, much like a damaged cat, but which turned out to be bag-pipes, violin, and drunken singing. The LBs were everywhere - we had no idea how many! They were all either sleeping, throwing up in corners, or otherwise acting extremely drunk. There was collapsible dancing, tragic singing, ineffective brawling, and bad life-choices were being made. Besides our brown smoke, they had broken out multiple bottles of MY absinthe (and were drinking it straight like barbarians). The situation called for cutlasses (our weapon of choice vs Fabers). Somebody actually called for cutlasses - I believe it was me.
We waded in with masks on and cutlasses swinging and slaughtered a few hundred. The mess was appalling. The masks didn’t work real well and we were all feeling a little sick by the time no living rats were in sight. Zed was a dear and sent Leah and I to our cabins while he, Bert and Sly cleaned up all the mess. I found out afterwards that he tipped them both substantially with rostygold.
EDIT: It’s been a long time since I’ve had a good cry - but not anymore. I must be exhausted. I don’t know what will happen next, or what else we can do. There were SO many of them!
edited by SilvaTomorrow on 6/14/2019
[color=#009900] - A Welcome Turn of Events - [/color]
Over the next few days, we continued to dispatch drunken Fabers, but the LBs have also been turning out all kinds of crap from below onto the deck and have apparently been ‘cleaning house’ - something I was not aware rats were capable of… The bigger surprise came early this morning, when a delegation of Faber rats came to negotiate, essentially to surrender.
Apparently off-shore storage is more valuable to the LBs than I had imagined, at least to this particular group. They actually offered to lease the space under certain conditions, for more than I had hoped to eventually lease storage for. I could barely contain myself to delay, consider, and deliberate with them. In summary, we will be sectioning off areas of the ship to their control, under a lease, which contains most of the lower decks and cargo areas, but with shared access to designated areas, and of course reserving the rooms above deck for exclusive human use, with some shared areas. There is also stipulation for managing logistics of supplies such as foodstuffs, and management of ongoing communication - points of contact, etc.
It’s a new start, and a welcome one. Though part of me cringes at hosting a large contingent of Faber Rats, I believe they are dealing in good faith, and that as long as we maintain a firm posture, "good fences make good neighbors", then the arrangement can work, even work well. My biggest remaining concern, and it is a huge concern, is how not to become publically associated with the rats. I have communicated to the Fabers the importance of the secrecy of our arrangement in terms they understand, and have their assurances of absolute discretion, but it is a definate fly in the ointment. I have a lot to think about.
Please, delicious friends, what are your thoughts on the matter? How should I plan to proceed?
- Out on vacation - may be around a little, but most likely won’t update for a few weeks -
[color=#009900] - The Good, the Bad, and the Inevitable - [/color]
It is the nature of treaties and business deals to require enforcement. Suffice it to say that nobody was surprise or unprepared. Our relationship with this colony of Fabers seems to have settled, however, so hopefully normal degrees (whatever that means in this situation) of due diligence will suffice going forwards. Sly has disappeared, and I am down to 8 fighting weasels. Bert has shouldered the full-time responsibility of keeping up with everything the Faber Rats are doing in terms of comings and goings, any construction (or destruction) projects, general population, and anything else that gets his attention. I have increased his wages and his ego quite a bit - but he more than earns his keep.
It seems that my concerns about being associated with LBs was unmerited. Word got out immediately, but apparently nobody cares. Business is where you find it, right? Which brings me to my next venture.
I am trying to get a foothold at the university, but can’t seem to uncover any opportunities which I can reasonably pursue. It is a mass of closed doors and brass ceilings to me, regardless of my many instances of academic assistance, well-received publications, not to mention a degree of ‘social engineering’ which has so far yielded no real benefit. What am I missing?..