Tystefy
Posts: 450
3/6/2018
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Here's the pitch.
State something within this thread. Anything. Anything relating to Fallen London, be it the story, browser / app, the people who made it, whatever meta-quality you could possible think of, or what-have-you.
What you say becomes canon.
Go.
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Will sometimes return to post absurdity.
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+4
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Passionario
Posts: 777
3/6/2018
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A constellation of unusually magnanimous Judgments adopts the Dawn Machine and, through care and love, they raise it to be their shining star.
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Passionario: Profile, Story, Ending
Passion: Profile, Appearance
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Bitty
Posts: 234
3/6/2018
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Next years mayoral candidates are a seeker, an utterly livid bat, and Mt Nomad
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Kalamari
Posts: 17
3/7/2018
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Each member of the Calendar Council reveals to the others that they are actually Constables in disguise.
The whole revolution is constables in disguise.
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http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Kalis%20Amar Main account, zailor and monster hunter extraordinaire! Open to all actions except Seeking and other negative ones.
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Rebecca%20Bhatt Alt account, poet and thief, tries to stay out of danger. Open to peaceful actions.
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Herbert%20Phillips%20West Second alt, seeker in the making. Will take any punishment.
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Optimatum
Posts: 3666
3/7/2018
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Masters dating sim.
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Optimatum, a ruthless and merciful gentleman. No plant battles, Affluent Photographer requests, or healing offers; all other social actions welcome.
 Want a sip of Cider? Just say hi!
PM me for information enigmatic or Fated. Though the forum please, not FL itself.
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Addis Rook
Posts: 125
3/10/2018
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Devils go to the future and bring back thousands and thousands of LOLcat pictures and mail them to the Duchess
edited by Addis Rook on 3/10/2018
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Addis Rook
Posts: 125
3/7/2018
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...You know how the Dawn Machine is basically a...
[spoiler]
Baby sun?
Teletubbies is the New Sequence.[/spoiler]
And that, children, is why you resist the dawn machine.
edited by Addis Rook on 3/7/2018
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Ixc
Posts: 365
3/7/2018
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The Masters become tiny and huggable.
And Mr Veils is crushed by a stray apple.
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Pleased to meet you. Ixc, spy and detective. Inventor of the Correspondence Cannon.
Are you a Paramount Presence? Record your name here. For posterity, of course.
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
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Kylestien
Posts: 749
3/7/2018
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Hedonistic characters successfully take over London and bring in a era of total debauchery.
Failbetter actualy releases a x rated side game in the FL style based on this called Fallen London After Dark.
It is a smash hit.
edited by Kylestien on 3/7/2018
--
I will accept all actions, though I hold the right to refuse for my own reasons. However, if you explain WHY you send me a harmful action like Loitering or Dantes,And I feel the reason good, I will consider it more. http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Kylestien
Persuasive patron. You want a lesson, send me a message asking for one.
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Sajach
Posts: 77
3/7/2018
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Next years mayor election is a tie between The Topsy King and His Amused Lordship resulting in them both sharing the office. Many sitcom style hilarious misadventures ensue throughout the year because of this arrangement.
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https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/Sajach
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Elaina Schill
Posts: 191
3/6/2018
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What remains of Mr Eaten is gathered in many warm blankets and given lots of warm broth and water. Through a lot of Neathy magic it regains a physical body and grieves through a lot of its betrayed-feelingness and ends up feeling much better before going somewhere it can feel loved and appreciated in whatever way giant space-bats can feel loved and appreciated. Also I'm married to the Pirate-Poet in a pleasant house with thousands of weasels and the Last Constable is happy.
edited by Iona Dre'emt on 3/6/2018
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Main, Phiri Ulfur, the Cunning Shadow. Their heart belongs to a Pirate-Poet across the Zee.
Alt Vermillion Liminate, the Tragic Scholar.
Alt #2,Lady Jacqueline Blackwood, the Savage Beauty.
Alt #3, Veracity Taylor, the Dame of the Docks.
The Dogged Seeker, self explanatory.
I will accept any social actions on Fallen London(unless its a box of live rats. I already got rid of the d---ned things once and am not eager to repeat the endeavor).
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millea
Posts: 45
3/6/2018
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Every Snuffer is happy and safe.
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 Elvira Blake, the Pariah's Doctor. ༺⚜️༻ Anne Meredith, the Disfigured Captain. 
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al2o3cr
Posts: 66
3/6/2018
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Addis Rook wrote:
The Masters are forced to enact a Tragedy Procedure when the Revolutionaries lay seige to the Bazaar by loading carriages they steal from throughout London with explosives and bouncing them into its spires.
This should be a mobile game, in the vein of Angry Birds 
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Optimatum
Posts: 3666
3/6/2018
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De Gustibus occurs every year.
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Optimatum, a ruthless and merciful gentleman. No plant battles, Affluent Photographer requests, or healing offers; all other social actions welcome.
Want a sip of Cider? Just say hi!
PM me for information enigmatic or Fated. Though the forum please, not FL itself.
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Addis Rook
Posts: 125
3/11/2018
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Failbetter silently adds in a new storylet at your lodgings with no explanation that unlocks when you acquire the "A Weaseler" accomplishment. All it says is "press button for weasels".
When you click it, every single weasel in your Fallen London inventory pours out of your screen and into your house in real life.
You might have had a life before, but now you have weasels.
edited by Addis Rook on 3/11/2018
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Greg M
Posts: 197
3/11/2018
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The weasels overthrow the Masters and force them into retirement. Fallen London is now much more humane and run by weasels. Except, alas, for Mahogany Hall, which is burned to the ground, or people who might have wanted to wear fur coats (no longer allowed). A Popular Song is banned upon penalty of Newgate (first offense) or banishment to the tomb colonies (2nd offense). 3rd offense = NORTH.
Mr. Pages, freed from the burden of Masterdom, becomes very successful as Fallen London's first stand-up comic. Mr. Wines opens a very well-reviewed vegetarian restaurant. Mr. Irons wanders around, muttering to himself about how he used to run the world.
ALL HAIL OUR WEASEL LORDS. ALL HAIL. ALL HAIL.
--
Profile: GregM.
http://www.fallenlondon.com/Profile/GregM
Available for any non-harmful social interactions.
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Adelaide deBusschet
Posts: 8
3/10/2018
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1. Spacemarine9 returns from his vacation up North, bringing his rats; Nuncio spontaneously combusts.
2. Salt, Aslan, and Yukari Yakumo have a three-way bout of fisticuffs to decide who gets the Uttermost East.
3. Everyone is a Snuffer. No exceptions.
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http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Adelaide%20deBusschet
Adelaide deBusschet, a lady of high society.
Feel free to send me any sort of social invites, excluding cats in boxes.
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Phèdre Delaunay
Posts: 25
3/21/2018
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Tystefy wrote:
A Master legit runs as a potential candidate in the next election...
... but they desperately try to disguise the fact that they're a Master.
But as soon as the Master starts talking, it becomes painfully obvious that he's Mr Pages. Also the opposing candidate is the Topsy King. Their debates give every Fallen Londoner the d---edest headache.
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https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/Phèdre%20Delaunay
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Six Handed Merchant
Posts: 141
3/10/2018
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“In matters of the Bazzar, look to love, always.”
If you get Masquing up to 1000, you can have the Bazzar itself as a marriageable companion.
Sure, your relationship has cosmically disastrous consequences for London, the Neath, the Earth, and the Local Fluff (yes, that is a real term!)…but the boost to your BDR is incredible!
Just be careful on dates, as any intimate liaisons with the Bazzar will automatically give you +100 CP to Wounds, Nightmares and Scandal. Also, DO NOT ATTEMPT A WALTZ.
And if you get Masquing to -1000, you get Mr. Eaten as your spouse, which automatically replaces any previous companions or spouse that you may have had. I’ll leave it to the Northridden to elaborate on the consequences of such a match. They’re probably the best people to ask about blowing up London anyway. ;-)
edited by Six Handed Merchant on 3/10/2018
--
The Six Handed Merchant: If it's the truth you seek, The Six Handed Merchant is the gentlemen-, er, lady-, er, detective you need! Just pay no heed to that Eradication Officer tailing Six: that poor fellow is simply out of his mind!
Six's Mantlepiece (I am available for roleplaying and SAs. My schedule is pretty full, so please PM me first to work out the details.)
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Optimatum
Posts: 3666
3/17/2018
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Tystefy wrote:
A Master legit runs as a potential candidate in the next election...
... but they desperately try to disguise the fact that they're a Master.
Seriously. If anything in this thread should be canon, it's this. FAILBETTER.
Vote Shacksh 1896! What are you talking about, Silas is definitely that tall and squeaky.
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Optimatum, a ruthless and merciful gentleman. No plant battles, Affluent Photographer requests, or healing offers; all other social actions welcome.
Want a sip of Cider? Just say hi!
PM me for information enigmatic or Fated. Though the forum please, not FL itself.
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Sir Joseph Marlen
Posts: 575
3/8/2018
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The game issues a poll to players on whether or not they want to activate or stop the Liberation of Night's device, and whichever side wins becomes canon.
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Sir Joseph Marlen - The Romantic Sophist
Alexus Harven - The Defiant Fatalist
Rose Reinhelm - The Respectful Revolutionary
Cappuccino - The Perfidious Spycraft
Available for any and all social actions.
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Addis Rook
Posts: 125
3/6/2018
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Extremely powerful hydraulics are attached to every carriage in London. Each and every inhabitant of London also acquires their own carriage through the charity of an unknown benefactor.
Shroom hopping in carriages becomes the newest craze to sweep London, everyone and their inconvenient aunt participate. The flit becomes a warzone filled with crashed carriages. Whenever someone crashes their carriage, they find the next day that they have a brand new one waiting for them outside their door.
Vake hunters weaponize the carriages and crash them into the vake whenever they spot him, putting an end to his reign of terror. Nowhere is safe from the carriages. The Masters are forced to enact a Tragedy Procedure when the Revolutionaries lay seige to the Bazaar by loading carriages they steal from throughout London with explosives and bouncing them into its spires.
edited by Addis Rook on 3/6/2018
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Elaina Schill
Posts: 191
3/6/2018
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Mr Eaten was elected London's mayor. Chaos ensues.
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Main, Phiri Ulfur, the Cunning Shadow. Their heart belongs to a Pirate-Poet across the Zee.
Alt Vermillion Liminate, the Tragic Scholar.
Alt #2,Lady Jacqueline Blackwood, the Savage Beauty.
Alt #3, Veracity Taylor, the Dame of the Docks.
The Dogged Seeker, self explanatory.
I will accept any social actions on Fallen London(unless its a box of live rats. I already got rid of the d---ned things once and am not eager to repeat the endeavor).
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The Lord Breakfast
Posts: 70
3/6/2018
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Everyone is Mr. Eaten.
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The Lord Breakfast, Captain Bacon, The Ageless Pirate, Bane of Salad, The Thrice-Mad, Eater of Pelicans
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ExceptionallyDelicious
Posts: 188
3/6/2018
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The Jovial Contrarian ran for Mayor again and beat Feducci.
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Any and all social actions are appreciated, and most will be reciprocated.
DavidJ, a self reflection (main): http://fallenlondon.com/Profile/DavidJ
Damien Erebus, a broken man and aspiring spymaster: http://fallenlondon.com/Profile/Damien%20Erebus
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Daedalus_Falk
Posts: 234
3/6/2018
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"Fallen London" does not exist. Its story was never written. This forum does not exist either.
Checkmate, atheists!
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https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/Daedalus_Falk
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For I was hungry, and you gave me rats. I was thirsty, and you gave me rats. I was naked, and you gave me rats. The rodents were gathered together, the cats slept in the Sun’s blindness, and the rats rose like the Moon, in the light at the edge of the cheese.
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Tystefy
Posts: 450
3/11/2018
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A weasel is chosen to go North.
And they do.
They kinda just burrow under the door, completely circumventing the entire storyline.
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Will sometimes return to post absurdity.
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ChangelingChilde
Posts: 231
3/10/2018
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Mr. Eaten returns to London with an army of wendigo and ghouls! A spider-senate replaces the sun; 'everyone is spiders' shall be the whole of the Law! No one is allowificated to use loquatiables save those inventerized by Mr. Pages! Shall I continue?
edited by GuesssWho on 3/10/2018
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DO you recall how the Hunger began?
I'm sorry, my darling, I don't think I can!
OUT past the High Wilderness and beyond
I fear I've gone Seeking, for of Him I'm fond.
--The Elfin Cannibal
Seven scars, seven chains, a soul too stained for Hell, and seven sainted candles burning at the well.
Gone to Grieve on the 17th day of the 7th month, 1897. Will be Vake-hunting next.
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Addis Rook
Posts: 125
3/21/2018
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The entire plot of Mean Girls happens for real at Summerset, with all the needed Neathy and period-appropriate alterations.
Also at the part where they're dancing on stage, Mr wines is dancing with them in the aisle cheering them on, and they kick the gramophone into Mr. Veil's face, at which point Mr. Wines almost bursts out laughing in Correspondence
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ExceptionallyDelicious
Posts: 188
3/6/2018
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Also, my Constable survived 
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Any and all social actions are appreciated, and most will be reciprocated.
DavidJ, a self reflection (main): http://fallenlondon.com/Profile/DavidJ
Damien Erebus, a broken man and aspiring spymaster: http://fallenlondon.com/Profile/Damien%20Erebus
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incerteza
Posts: 103
3/7/2018
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You can feed your Aunt, Devils, and the Struggling Artist to your plant.
The Masters take wing and go find a better employer.
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Bitty
Posts: 234
3/7/2018
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Optimatum wrote:
Masters dating sim.
I thought we were supposed to be ruining the game! Not improving it! 
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Optimatum
Posts: 3666
3/9/2018
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Isn't that already pretty much the case?
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Optimatum, a ruthless and merciful gentleman. No plant battles, Affluent Photographer requests, or healing offers; all other social actions welcome.
Want a sip of Cider? Just say hi!
PM me for information enigmatic or Fated. Though the forum please, not FL itself.
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Elaina Schill
Posts: 191
3/9/2018
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Everyone has morals and is kind to one another except Mr Veils who we all bond in hatred towards. Also instead of cloaks the Masters all wear snuggies and bunny slippers.
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Main, Phiri Ulfur, the Cunning Shadow. Their heart belongs to a Pirate-Poet across the Zee.
Alt Vermillion Liminate, the Tragic Scholar.
Alt #2,Lady Jacqueline Blackwood, the Savage Beauty.
Alt #3, Veracity Taylor, the Dame of the Docks.
The Dogged Seeker, self explanatory.
I will accept any social actions on Fallen London(unless its a box of live rats. I already got rid of the d---ned things once and am not eager to repeat the endeavor).
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Blaine Davidson
Posts: 388
3/9/2018
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By combining 7 Heptagoats you can create the final Omegagoat which allows you to transcend all other beings in the Fallon London Universe.
None can withstand your goatly might. All shall bear witness to your goatliness.
--
Blaine Davidson, a reserved and sensible woman with a fondness of collecting rarities.
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Tystefy
Posts: 450
3/8/2018
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Bitty wrote:
Optimatum wrote:
Masters dating sim.
I thought we were supposed to be ruining the game! Not improving it!
My original goal was to end this thread after The Fifth City was annihilated in the ensuing chaos... buuuuut since the very first comment erased FL's existence, we can ignore that goal for now.
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Will sometimes return to post absurdity.
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Reinol von Lorica
Posts: 102
3/6/2018
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The Honey Addled Detective was elected as London’s Mayor.
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https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/Reinol%20von%20Lorica
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The Curious Watcher
Posts: 263
3/6/2018
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The reinstatement of Knife-and-Candle (I've heard about it, but it's before my time).
A long-term consequence (could be in the form of an infrequent card) based on what you do with the location of the Nadir.
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The Thirteenth Master of the Bazaar:
https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/The%20Thirteenth%20Master%20of%20the%20Bazaar
The Silent Vake Hunter: GONE NORTH
The Ravenous Wanderer:
https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/The%20Ravenous%20Wanderer
The Melancholic End-Bringer:
https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/The%20Melancholic%20End-Bringer
The Lethal Nightmare:
https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/The%20Lethal%20Nightmare
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Kukapetal
Posts: 1449
3/6/2018
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The Manager of the Royal Beth is fed feetfirst into a woodchipper.
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Tystefy
Posts: 450
3/15/2018
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A Master legit runs as a potential candidate in the next election...
... but they desperately try to disguise the fact that they're a Master.
Seriously. If anything in this thread should be canon, it's this. FAILBETTER.
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Will sometimes return to post absurdity.
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Optimatum
Posts: 3666
3/22/2018
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It is! Laughter sounds like the crackle of broken light.
--
Optimatum, a ruthless and merciful gentleman. No plant battles, Affluent Photographer requests, or healing offers; all other social actions welcome.
Want a sip of Cider? Just say hi!
PM me for information enigmatic or Fated. Though the forum please, not FL itself.
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Dungerson
Posts: 44
3/22/2018
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The message of love that the Sun entrusted to the Bazaar was actually intended for the Struggling Artist, and you can't convince me otherwise that this isn't why everyone reacted the way they did.
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http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/profile/Dungerson
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Tystefy
Posts: 450
4/18/2018
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Hell doesn't actually have a use for souls but they keep trying to find new, innovative ways to spend their treasure hoard.
Soul-powered engines (simple coke turns out to be more efficient.)
Lava lamps (They don't burn bright enough and there isn't any actual lava inside the lamp despite the fact it's from Hell, disappointing many would-be buyers.)
Bedside Nightlights (They just. Keep. CLINKING.)
Using a soul to smash the bottle against a ship when you put a ship in the water for the first time or something akin to that, in an effort to save a poor precious bottle of wine from being smashed instead (Oops. Now the ship's haunted.)
Literally giving the souls to The Church in exchange for money (Church believes this is a trick or scam or they have some sinister ulterior motive since it goes against the age-old believe that Hell doesn't export souls.)
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Will sometimes return to post absurdity.
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xKiv
Posts: 846
3/16/2018
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Iona Dre'emt wrote:
The Gracious Widow is murdered by and then replaced by your Aunt.
Long before you were born.
--
https://www.fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/xKiv - a witchful, percussive, dangermous and shadowry scholar of coexplodence, hopsidirean, and walker of fallen kitties.
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Elaina Schill
Posts: 191
3/13/2018
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The Gracious Widow is murdered by and then replaced by your Aunt.
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Main, Phiri Ulfur, the Cunning Shadow. Their heart belongs to a Pirate-Poet across the Zee.
Alt Vermillion Liminate, the Tragic Scholar.
Alt #2,Lady Jacqueline Blackwood, the Savage Beauty.
Alt #3, Veracity Taylor, the Dame of the Docks.
The Dogged Seeker, self explanatory.
I will accept any social actions on Fallen London(unless its a box of live rats. I already got rid of the d---ned things once and am not eager to repeat the endeavor).
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ChangelingChilde
Posts: 231
3/21/2018
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Addis Rook wrote:
The entire plot of Mean Girls happens for real at Summerset, with all the needed Neathy and period-appropriate alterations.
Also at the part where they're dancing on stage, Mr wines is dancing with them in the aisle cheering them on, and they kick the gramophone into Mr. Veil's face, at which point Mr. Wines almost bursts out laughing in Correspondence
Is it possible to laugh specifically in Correspondence?
--
DO you recall how the Hunger began?
I'm sorry, my darling, I don't think I can!
OUT past the High Wilderness and beyond
I fear I've gone Seeking, for of Him I'm fond.
--The Elfin Cannibal
Seven scars, seven chains, a soul too stained for Hell, and seven sainted candles burning at the well.
Gone to Grieve on the 17th day of the 7th month, 1897. Will be Vake-hunting next.
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Tystefy
Posts: 450
3/13/2018
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Vake runs for president.
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Will sometimes return to post absurdity.
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Addis Rook
Posts: 125
3/8/2018
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Ixc wrote:
The Masters become tiny and huggable.
And Mr Veils is crushed by a stray apple.
Devils bring a microwave back from the future and I throw Mr. Veils inside and set it for 30 minutes
edited by Addis Rook on 3/8/2018
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Elaina Schill
Posts: 191
3/9/2018
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There are no human keepers in the Labyrinth of tigers. It's literally just tigers.
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Main, Phiri Ulfur, the Cunning Shadow. Their heart belongs to a Pirate-Poet across the Zee.
Alt Vermillion Liminate, the Tragic Scholar.
Alt #2,Lady Jacqueline Blackwood, the Savage Beauty.
Alt #3, Veracity Taylor, the Dame of the Docks.
The Dogged Seeker, self explanatory.
I will accept any social actions on Fallen London(unless its a box of live rats. I already got rid of the d---ned things once and am not eager to repeat the endeavor).
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Phèdre Delaunay
Posts: 25
3/7/2018
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All spirifers are arrested and fed to the Cantigaster.
Also a Misunderstood Genius invents a flamethrower and decides to try it out by roasting that d***ed spider council at the Docks. Ewwww, spiders.
edited by Phèdre Delaunay on 3/7/2018
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---
https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/Phèdre%20Delaunay
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ChangelingChilde
Posts: 231
3/21/2018
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Phèdre Delaunay wrote:
Tystefy wrote:
A Master legit runs as a potential candidate in the next election...
... but they desperately try to disguise the fact that they're a Master.
But as soon as the Master starts talking, it becomes painfully obvious that he's Mr Pages. Also the opposing candidate is the Topsy King. Their debates give every Fallen Londoner the d---edest headache.
This is the best thing ever.
--
DO you recall how the Hunger began?
I'm sorry, my darling, I don't think I can!
OUT past the High Wilderness and beyond
I fear I've gone Seeking, for of Him I'm fond.
--The Elfin Cannibal
Seven scars, seven chains, a soul too stained for Hell, and seven sainted candles burning at the well.
Gone to Grieve on the 17th day of the 7th month, 1897. Will be Vake-hunting next.
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ChangelingChilde
Posts: 231
3/13/2018
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Tystefy wrote:
Vake runs for president.
. . . President of where?
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DO you recall how the Hunger began?
I'm sorry, my darling, I don't think I can!
OUT past the High Wilderness and beyond
I fear I've gone Seeking, for of Him I'm fond.
--The Elfin Cannibal
Seven scars, seven chains, a soul too stained for Hell, and seven sainted candles burning at the well.
Gone to Grieve on the 17th day of the 7th month, 1897. Will be Vake-hunting next.
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Tystefy
Posts: 450
3/10/2018
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Every single entity who posted in this thread gets a cameo somewhere in the Fallen London writings.
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Will sometimes return to post absurdity.
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Honeyaddict
Posts: 501
3/7/2018
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I actually managed to make friends!
De Gustibus occurs yearly, much like Hallowmas and The Feast of the Exceptional Rose!
--
Honeyaddict, Scarlet Saint, Paramount Presence
pleasure to meet you.
Has some ideas the Masters won't approve of like some items and establishing a Colony in Parabola.
I will accept most social interactions (not duping). I do enjoy role playing as well.
Have some possibly still active codes!
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Meradine Heidenreich
Posts: 468
3/7/2018
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Honeyaddict wrote:
I actually managed to make friends!
De Gustibus occurs yearly, much like Hallowmas and The Feast of the Exceptional Rose!
Not sure that's true any more.I've never seen it, and I've played for over two years now. Still waiting to get rid of those cave fishies.
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https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/Meradine%20Heidenreich
The Starveling kit
Gobbled up the bit
of cheese on my tray ..
"O Weh!"
No plant battles, please.
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Sajach
Posts: 77
3/7/2018
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Meradine Heidenreich wrote:
Honeyaddict wrote:
I actually managed to make friends!
De Gustibus occurs yearly, much like Hallowmas and The Feast of the Exceptional Rose!
Not sure that's true any more.I've never seen it, and I've played for over two years now. Still waiting to get rid of those cave fishies.
This is a thread about ridiculous suggestions for things to add to the game, he didn't think it was actually happening yearly.
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https://www.fallenlondon.com/profile/Sajach
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