I was about to say I don't really know what the Vake is, but I don't think anyone knows if it exists. If no-one knows anything about it, how do we know it hasn't already been caught, or if it even exists in the first place?

"I wonder if anyone has ever tried to simply build a child. Can't be much worse then a zubmarine."

Things with fangs in general should not be trusted. How am I supposed to have any academic standing if I have to live with the fact that the laws of nature are malleable at best, and at worst, false.

"I like that the natural laws are weaker, down here. On the Surface, a human railing against her humble fate would not have a fighting chance. Here, the odds are a little better."

Gregory chuckles and holds up a hand.

"Amelia is almost there. Only one of them, is a snuffer. But all three are guilty. The woman has just entered an abandoned building without an explanation to give, what reason would one have, other than to loot or commit other various misdeeds. Obviously, this is a character of no fine virtue, and regardless of her status as a possible snuffer, is likely not innocent in this affair. The old man is obviously squatting, hardly a noble affair, and supposedly is claiming this as his home, likely untrue, so the man is obviously hiding something, and is likely either up to something shady himself, or is the snuffer in question. As for the other gentleman, well, if nothing else, he is guilty of attempting to claim your bounty. The solution? Give them each a good hard drubbing, see which one has a face that peels off, hand the others into the constables to see what they can sort out, unless the hunter is one of the innocents, in which case, take him back to Medusa's head, apologize for the sorry business and buy him a drink. It's a trick question of sorts, as, in cases like these a good drubbing to all parties is quite consistantly the best solution!"

"I'm just sayin' tha ruddy loud mouf askin' fer tha same bloody fing til he gots tha answer serves a reminder. He wouldn't do tha if it were a Master bein' questioned or anyone on the upper side o' society. Thay always look fer ta ones thay don sing praises fer and will be forgotten long for a constable has 'em by tha leg." She huffs a bit.

"I doubt not a bloke 'ere hasn't been ta New Newgate. But tha bars be filled wiff a chunk from Spite 'n keeps bein' filled wiff every turn. But who cares when thar naught up ta snuff fer society wiff thar fancy dinners and celebrations all ta bloody time."

"We're not an item."
Vaustus mumbles.
"'n my name's Lord Vaustus Skantoth Pardiso Kam Von Guttenshith the ninth."
He then falls asleep.

"Yes, regrettable isn't it. I won't lie, the soul trade has made me a great deal of money, but it's so hard to deal with creatures whose every affectation is an act designed to win your confidence. I was once a great admirer of an affectionate devil, and thought myself greatly admired. Foolish. Devils cannot feel."

((Sexy friend, oh ho ho? Where is that coming from Lamia? ))

It's wearing someone's face, just in case you forgot. Someone's face.

"Okay...okay..." Then, violently shaking the vegetable like it was a weightless ragdoll, rage builds in his expression. "SHUT THE CHRIST UP YOU MORONIC VEGETABLE! THERE'S NO VIOLENCE HAPPENING YOU WOULDN'T EVEN BE HELPING IF THERE WAS! QUIET! FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD IN THE NEATH CEASE YOUR SCREAMING!"

Drake Dynamo wrote:

"New idea: we kidnap a Master. Wines is probably the best choice, he loves to attend salons. Then, we get the tallest among us to impersonate Wines, giving us an entrance to the Bazaar. From there, we kidnap the Masters one by one, all the while finding impersonators. When only Veils is left, we unveil our plot. He'll have no choice but to hand the reigns over to a democratically elected council at that point."

"Here's a fun game for you and your watchful friends to try next time when you attend a party or a salon where Mr. Wines is present: see who among you manages to spot more Special Constables among the guests. I believe that the current record is 273, set by Implacable Detective at Ambitious Barrister's fourth wedding. Or was it the third one? They all blur together after awhile. Anyway, the thing about being on security detail at formal events is that it's one of the most frustrating and boring tasks in the world - unless someone does something daft like trying to kidnap a Master in the middle of scriptural charades game. So if you want to make a lot of tense and rough people very, very happy, then pulling a stunt like that would the best way to achieve it (or, at least, the best way that does not involve donning scarlet stockings on a Saturday night).

On other hand, if your goal is to actually succeed, then remember what I've said before. Change always requires power, and power, more often than not, comes from hard work and sacrifices. If you want a clear shot at a Master, you'd better be prepared to lie, cheat, brownnose and murder your way up the ladder for years, until you're in a trusted position with access to all the keys, passphrases, secret passages and patrol schedules."

Passionario smiles broadly, the shine of his grin rivalling the gleam of his brass buttons.

"Or you could find someone who has already done all that unpleasantness, and make them an offer that would convince them to give up all the perks of their office and join your plot. But that would have to be one staggeringly good offer."

"Have you tried that pie shop for lunch? You know, the one under a barber shop?"

"If blemmigans can write poetry and have feelings and desires who knows what else they're capable of. Will we one day give blemmigans the vote? Will we have blemmigan lord mayors and blemmigan parliamentarians? Perhaps they already do vote in their own way. Who's to say the Uttershroom is not some bizarre ruler as well as an island and thus our destruction of it would not only be pest control but also a high-profile assassination.

Also, as an aside, has anyone thought of just dropping a few thousand cats on the Uttershroom . Those creatures will eat just about anything (I saw them eat a Master once!) and they're more thorough than fire if they set their minds to it."

"
Hmm. Well, to restate my earlier inquiry, are there any manner of flora or fauna you would like to see hunted down?"

"MS LAMIA. THE NICE, PRETTY FLESH WOMAN. SHE OWNS THIS PLACE."

"The V--- is a man dressed as a bat. Or a bat-man. It speaks English. It can fly. It has discriminating tastes in romantic literature."

*Maria attempts to joke* "Some also steal your heart *she turns serious again and gets a bottle of Mushroom Vodka from her jacket, filling it into her teacup* Not all humans treacherous. I am thief, but we have a very strong honour, maam. We don't betray our comrades. Never, under any cases. Ask my friend, Eli, if you want. I don't abuse such a wonderful thing as love, too. You can trust criminal. I, Citizen Maria Konstantynopolska, swear I never will betray my lover and I won't rob her. When I arrived, had an affair with heiress. I didn't take anything from her. And I will never rob her, as I won't anyone I broke up with. If I break this promise, may I be poisoned a dozen times with horrible, surface poison, then with vake poison and THEN land in Hell... um, I won't be put in hell for loving people like Eliza, will I?"

I sincerely hope you compensated him the losses. He is clearly the victim of a vile scam thrown by revolutionaries to make a buck to advance their putrid goal of eliminating ALL LIGHT! What would happen to fashion? How would we live without discerning the color of dresses worn by our peers!? What would happen to society at large without the ability to judge someone's fashion sense?!

"Don't let the cat lap up glass shards." (It's Lamea. Lamea has to clean it up.)

"Wait, how do you spend your spare moments?"

Elias builds a handkerchief fort around Fleshy

"In a way, your Devil did love you. Just had a funny way of showing it."

"Shame about that business with your eyes though. Was it sorrow spiders, or were you just feeling adventurous with your reading material?"

Bertrand Leonidas Poole wrote:

Not pretty, what's under the masks. The eyes look very human, but the rest is quite horrific.

Flesh-Stick: don't talk about my naturalist that way, bert

"Hmm. Well, to restate my earlier inquiry, are there any manner of flora or fauna you would like to see hunted down?"

"Will we one day give blemmigans the vote?"

"Apple cider. The golden apples of the Hesperides, if the old myths are in fact true." Eglantine frowns thoughtfully. "Idunn's apples, gold apples of youth, they come up in so many stories from so many places..."

"Oh. Yeah, no. Gazter and I are conflicting characters, like oil and water. I have sense and he thinks he has The Neath all figured out from stepping off the boat from The Cumean Canal."

Eli blows a huff of smoke dirisvely. "Speaking of which, did you get my parcel, Gazter? Lesson one, never open a package from someone you don't trust."

(Lamia mutters something about 'Englishmen'.)

"You should ask the Duchess where she purchases hers. I would also suggest the Bazaar sidestreets, or personally accosting any trade vessel that has come from the Cumean canal. Even if they've promised their cargo to another seller, they're usually open to a little persuasion when they're caught en route."

I'm no member of the minstery, but you may want to rethink publishing that. Speaking of those Rubbery fellow, I still cannot comprehend what they are. I have surrounded myself with them to attempt to decipher their origins, but I have had no breakthroughs so far. Where do they even get those green suits? It must be an absolute terror to attempt to even tailor a suit for those beasts.

Returning the aggressive cuddle, Vaustus ponders Sara's words.
"Wait! We know devilish FOOD isn't harmful to humans (I'm sure we've all eaten at Dante's) just the drink! So, if you go to hell, the only thing youd miss would be alcohol!"
Vaustus pauses, and realizes what he's saying.
"Darling, let's never, ever go to hell, alright?"
He says to Eglantine.