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Privy at the Bazaar Messages in this topic - RSS

Blaine Davidson
Blaine Davidson
Posts: 396

12/22/2015
Lisbella Peridot wrote:
Where's the exceptional pitch?


A dank and cloying miasma has ascended onto the streets of London.

Wheezing rats collapse in the gutters of Spite while bats desperately cling to the stalactites above. Perfumes and incense have long sold out and the Masters are nowhere to be seen. The Bazaar is sickly quiet.

Pinch your nose and choke through abandoned alleys in this unanticipated and unwanted Unexceptional Story. Hunt for Mr. C******'s upended manhole. Explore the depths of London's sewers in greater detail than anyone should want. STAIN YOUR SOUL.


This month we're introducing the first and last of our Unexceptional Stories. The Return of Mr. C******* was written by [REDACTED] who was later publicly shamed and fired. Play An Unexceptional Story: It came from the privy anywhere in London to begin. Exceptional Friends can then continue the story in the House of Chimes where they will become Unexceptional Friends for their lack of better judgment.

Unexceptional Friends can enjoy many benefits such as:

* Being banned indefinitely from the House of Chimes.
* Experiencing our newly introduced menace, Unfortunate Hygiene.
* Having your lodgings permanently relocated to a Clammy Cesspool.
* Disappointing your parents.

At the end of the month we will discontinue this Unexceptional Story and never speak of it again.
edited by Blaine Davidson on 12/22/2015

--
Blaine Davidson, a reserved and sensible woman with a fondness of collecting rarities.
+25 link
Pyrodinium
Pyrodinium
Posts: 639

12/22/2015
The Masters play the new monthly content:

Mr. Cups: Not on the china. Good grief NOT ON THE CHINA!

Mr. Fires: Maybe a new city isn't a bad idea after all.

Mr. Hearts: I'll ask the good Bishop if he can prepare a creature that can take care of this smell.

Mr. Iron: [We are not speaking of this content again. Mr. Pages must explain himself]

Mr. Pages: what a catastrophic calamitous cr****r! I must fortify my abode posthaste!

Mr. Sacks: We are now considering the virtue of giving rather than taking.

Mr. Spices: That golden liquid wasn't honey, was it?

Mr. Stones: NOT MINE!

Mr. Veils: (not available for comment. However, there are several sightings of the Vake repeatedly headbutting the cavern's roof.)

Mr. Wines: (Not available for comment. Seems to be out of the zee and having one of his revels.)

MR. EATEN: I should probably postpone the reckoning...

--
My profiles: http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Pyrodinium
(A Monster hunter on the hunt of his twin brother's killer. Overprotective dad of his twin's daughter)
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Rudolph~of~Taured
(an indeterminate person of potentially rubbery lineage)
* All social actions except photographers and loitering welcome!
+13 link
Estelle Knoht
Estelle Knoht
Posts: 1751

12/22/2015
Estelle Knoht wrote:




"The Bazaar has been feasting on Tomb-Cockroaches that has fallen into the Sundered Sea. It only makes her more constipated, and that's worse for all of us... but especially those who love her."

Its eyes are bright. "I'm pissborn," it says, "There are no worse things you could have showed to the Dragons. Excrement, hurtling forever towards the earth. A love which failed, and a fall into chamberpot. It tells, too, of the stink to High Wilderness. I felt sorry for the Bazaar."

A scream rips the night behind you. The Pooman is grappling with a hunched figure. In the orange gaslights you see the figure raising a sign not unlike those held by a Union worker on strike, but in Mr Irons' handwriting: "
YOU WILL MAKE THE WORK ENVIRONMENT OR THEY WILL BE MADE FOR YOU."

Go beyond the Sundered Sea and mount an expedition to the Bazaar's privy! The most dirty secret of the Neath are open to you. Take on the new menace of Tomb-Cockroaches, whose unnatural vitality render them immune to squashing. Revisit Theological Husbandry, and create a new creature that will topples the balance of power of the known world, or even postpone the reckoning... indefinitely.

edited by Estelle Knoht on 12/22/2015

--
Estelle Knoht, a juvenile, unreliable and respectable lady.
I currently do not accept any catbox, cider, suppers, calling cards or proteges.
+15 link
Gonen
Gonen
Posts: 818

12/22/2015
Dear god, I cannot believe I'm replying to this. *Sigh*.



CRAPBOUND!
Clear the path yourself?...

--
The Ashen Anesthesiologist - Paramount Londoner

Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; Who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness.

The long journey to eccentricity:
On March 10th, 2018, reached 15 on all quirks, simultaneously. The Quirky Anesthesiologist
+14 link
Pyrodinium
Pyrodinium
Posts: 639

12/22/2015
Gonen wrote:
Dear god, I cannot believe I'm replying to this. *Sigh*.



CRAPBOUND!
Clear the path yourself?...



Until further notice, I AM NOT accepting invitations to a private supper from any posters in this thread.

--
My profiles: http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Pyrodinium
(A Monster hunter on the hunt of his twin brother's killer. Overprotective dad of his twin's daughter)
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Rudolph~of~Taured
(an indeterminate person of potentially rubbery lineage)
* All social actions except photographers and loitering welcome!
+12 link
The Master
The Master
Posts: 804

12/22/2015
Gonen wrote:
Dear god, I cannot believe I'm replying to this. *Sigh*.



CRAPBOUND!
Clear the path yourself?...


...Or with fate...pay the Masters to do it for you...

--
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Lolwolfking
A very ruthless and daring doctor of the neath.

No more gift exchanges, im getting too many and I can barely hold these.
He has knowledge of a certain enigma, ask, you will get a clue.
+7 link
Cimanyd
Cimanyd
Posts: 38

12/22/2015
(Why am I actually replying to this thread? This seems like a mistake.)

If the current set of Exceptional Stories follows the theme Heart's Blood...

What theme would this follow?

What might the other 2 or 3 stories be? (Would there be a two-part story?)

What theme-related unique items would they give?
edited by Cimanyd on 12/22/2015

--
Cimanyd, the Northbound Correspondent
"There are some things we were not meant to know, they say. But you wouldn't be down here if you took that seriously."
0 link
myrese
myrese
Posts: 22

12/22/2015
The theme would probably be Justifiably Hidden or something to that effect.

Hmm...you know, that theme seems to fit a certain infamous quest perfectly. Perhaps the final story would lead to a re-introduction of the Mr. Eaten content?

--
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/myrese
A former Constable with a soft spot for children.
+3 link
Passionario
Passionario
Posts: 777

12/22/2015
So I finally got around to playing The Return of Mr. Crapper and I have to admit that I was pleasantly surprised. After the introductory storylet about brown foul-smelling grafitti on the wall of St. Fiacre's, I expected a torrent of scatological jokes, but the rest of the story was quite tastefully done (a few exceptions notwithstanding).

-= MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD =-

[spoiler]The London part of the investigation into the link between grafitti and the 'ancient exile' was pretty interesting. I particularly liked the little references to Seeking the Name and TRAVELLER RETURNING. The bit with the Urchins was one of the aforementioned exceptions, but it was thankfully short, and I guess all that toilet humour is thematically appropriate for them.

The real meat of the story was, of course, in Far Khanate. I didn't get a chance to explore all the carousels available there, but from what I've seen, it seems to be a great place for either grinding or spending one's Great Game connection. Alas, my Suspicion was spiralling out of control, so I did just enough to get an audience with the titular renegade Master - or, as he used to be known in the Fourth City, the Khan of Dung.

The story of his self-imposed exile and potential return raises a few questions about the current Masters. As we know from Affair of the Box and other sources, not all of them are united in their opinions on London. Crapper/Dung's actions set a dangerous precedent for them. Who would stay behind with London's overzee colonies? Who would return to Sixth City at its hour of twilight?

When it came to the big choice, I predictably picked the status quo and convinced Mr. Crapper that this particular trade portfolio was already divided between Pages and Veils. The demonstration challenge was another of the aforementioned exceptions, but one that was fairly funny. Note that, unlike the 'Intoxicating' quality in the Flint story, the value number for 'Soft Tissue' on the items you use actually matters - the higher it is, the greater the progress. I'm not sure how low-level players are supposed to reach the target number, unless they were lucky enough to bring a lot of Proscribed Material and Whisper-Silk with them. As for me, I took this opportunity to, for the lack of better word, dump my excess Theosophistical Research Notes, Sworn Statements and Pages of Salacious Copy.

(And no, going over 200 doesn't give any extra benefit, so there's no reason to wipe it with Veils-Velvet, Crimson Book or the wedding letter from the Empress. Unless you really, really want to)

Upon returning to London, I got a nice reward from the Masters and other interested parties. If anyone picked the other option - to become Mr. Crapper's agent and assist in his eventual return - please PM me or just post a journal echo link.[/spoiler]

--
Passionario: Profile, Story, Ending
Passion: Profile, Appearance
+14 link

Guest

12/23/2015
Cimanyd wrote:
(Why am I actually replying to this thread? This seems like a mistake.)

If the current set of Exceptional Stories follows the theme Heart's Blood...

What theme would this follow?

What might the other 2 or 3 stories be? (Would there be a two-part story?)

What theme-related unique items would they give?
edited by Cimanyd on 12/22/2015




(Please...stop...don't reply to it..ARGGGGH!)
Actually, this story is Number Two.
+4 link
malthaussen
malthaussen
Posts: 1060

12/23/2015
So, maybe de Quincey wrote an essay "On crapping considered as one of the fine arts?" It would tie in with the next Exceptional Story cycle.

-- Mal

--
"Of two choices, I always take the third."
Will do all socials except Loitering or Private Evenings (all my Free Evenings are accounted for), and Affluent Photographer Betrayals only, please. I am not currently accepting calling cards.
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/malthaussen
0 link
Lady Sapho Byron
Lady Sapho Byron
Posts: 786

12/23/2015
Passionario wrote:


-= MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD =-



Major "Soilers" I think you meant.



  • --
    http://fallenlondon.com/Profile/Lady%20Sapho%20L%20Byron
    Fighting the Menace of Corsetry Since 1892.
  • +11 link

    Guest

    12/23/2015
    Lady Sapho Byron wrote:
    Passionario wrote:


    -= MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD =-



    Major "Soilers" I think you meant.


    Done
    0 link
    Pyrodinium
    Pyrodinium
    Posts: 639

    12/26/2015
    Guys, it seems that there's also free content associated with Mr. Crapper:

    Installing a new sewage pipe: A Flush Lay

    --
    My profiles: http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Pyrodinium
    (A Monster hunter on the hunt of his twin brother's killer. Overprotective dad of his twin's daughter)
    http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Rudolph~of~Taured
    (an indeterminate person of potentially rubbery lineage)
    * All social actions except photographers and loitering welcome!
    +13 link
    Morkan Kassington
    Morkan Kassington
    Posts: 261

    4/30/2016
    What did i just read

    --
    Ladies of the Neath, here comes Morkan Kassington, the gem among gentlemen
    (He is actually a self-centered and foolish braggart, but he means no harm. Hit him up for social actions or dangerous lessons! Or just flirt.)
    +1 link
    Vavakx Nonexus
    Vavakx Nonexus
    Posts: 894

    4/30/2016
    Morkan Kassington wrote:
    What did i just read



    Some exceptionally crappy puns, sir.

    --
    Amets Estibariz, the Moulting Eidolon: Cradled by a sun all their own.


    Blabbing, the Hobo Everyone Knows: The One Who Pulls The Strings. A Clarity In The Darkness.


    Charlotte and the Caretaker: A family?
    +2 link
    The Master
    The Master
    Posts: 804

    4/30/2016
    Vavakx Nonexus wrote:
    Morkan Kassington wrote:
    What did i just read



    Some Unexceptionally crappy puns, sir.


    Fixed.

    --
    http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Lolwolfking
    A very ruthless and daring doctor of the neath.

    No more gift exchanges, im getting too many and I can barely hold these.
    He has knowledge of a certain enigma, ask, you will get a clue.
    +3 link
    Zoe DeGeest
    Zoe DeGeest
    Posts: 104

    4/30/2016
    I just read all of this! My eyes....

    Vavakx Nonexus wrote:


    Some exceptionally crappy puns, sir.


    You did that on purpose, didbn't you!

    More importantly I hope something more will come because I am dying inside from this....

    --
    Zoe DeGeest, your humble churchgoing grocer, now respectable.
    0 link
    Vavakx Nonexus
    Vavakx Nonexus
    Posts: 894

    4/30/2016
    Zoe DeGeest wrote:
    I just read all of this! My eyes....

    Vavakx Nonexus wrote:


    Some exceptionally crappy puns, sir.


    You did that on purpose, didbn't you!

    More importantly I hope something more will come because I am dying inside from this....



    Yes, I know. My puns are shit.

    --
    Amets Estibariz, the Moulting Eidolon: Cradled by a sun all their own.


    Blabbing, the Hobo Everyone Knows: The One Who Pulls The Strings. A Clarity In The Darkness.


    Charlotte and the Caretaker: A family?
    +1 link
    Estelle Knoht
    Estelle Knoht
    Posts: 1751

    4/30/2016


    You guys keep it up, I am off
    edited by Estelle Knoht on 4/30/2016

    --
    Estelle Knoht, a juvenile, unreliable and respectable lady.
    I currently do not accept any catbox, cider, suppers, calling cards or proteges.
    +7 link




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