KittehEllis
Posts: 7
12/3/2015
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I dunno where to put this, to be entirely honest. I don't have twitter or facebook, and I didn't see a messaging thing on the blog, nor did I see a standard report feature on the site. So, I'll just drop this here and hope it's seen.
I was spending my time on the river with the boatman, playing chess with him. Currently level 16 of Boatman's Opponent and finally succeeded with my cruddy Watchful score. Then I got this message;
"The Boatman hisses as he topples his king with a bony knuckle. "Enjoy it while it lasts," he growls. "You're all of you mine in the end.""
Trying to upload a picture, but I can't seem to do it.
I'm bad at forums.
Sorry if this is the wrong place for this
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malthaussen
Posts: 1060
12/3/2015
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It's colloquial speech, yes. On your sanity, you know best. [basically, it is semantically equivalent to "All of you are mine in the end."]
-- Mal
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"Of two choices, I always take the third."
Will do all socials except Loitering or Private Evenings (all my Free Evenings are accounted for), and Affluent Photographer Betrayals only, please. I am not currently accepting calling cards.
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/malthaussen
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Schmidt
Posts: 114
12/3/2015
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I think the extra commas just muddy the flow of the thing. I'd say it's fine as is.
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http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Atticus%20Schmidt
I'll accept any actions, except loitering and Affluent Photographer (will accept dupes).
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Kittenpox
Posts: 869
12/3/2015
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Estelle Knoht wrote:
Cecil wrote:
OH, there is a typo, I think, the lack of commas I think.
It might supposed to be "You're, all of you, mine ni the end"
I Found A Typo 
--
Kittenpox
Current [Fabulous Diamond] count: Twenty-Five (of 50). Halfway there! ^_^
Metaphysical Caprice: 11.
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Currently: Returned to the Neath, and regaining my footing in this place. :-)
NO PLANT BATTLES PLEASE.
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Gerald Edgerton
Posts: 127
12/8/2015
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So, the voice I hear when I read Death's lines is kind of like Bill Nighy's in some of his villainous roles - if he's anything less than delighted than it could be described as dry and wary, and "breathily menacing" doesn't require raising his voice at all.
"You're all of you mine in the end."
For an undetermined but m a s s i v e length of time it's been ferrying people on that boat. Its clothes are semiformal, not unlike something Tom Waits might wear, but they're moldy with centuries of the humidity of the river. It still carries itself with a confidence and gravity befitting somebody who's been doing their job for thousands of years in the same tiny workspace, while remaining omniscient concerning death. It is never surprised to see you, but by some law it has to honor the game. It's been playing a long time and it's ferociously experienced and effective. It doesn't lose often and isn't a good loser. It keeps its composure, just barely, but wants you not to enjoy your victory. It wants you to know you'll be back.
And everybody's always trying to get away. It has no sympathy for its numberless quarries. In the plot of the game, the player character is a brilliant and pivotal figure but to Death we're just a messy account. It wants us to know we're insignificant, so when it loses a game it derides our entire species.
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Lashkar
Posts: 109
12/5/2015
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One thing to keep in mind is that the internet is used by people from all over the world so if you're not British or from a post British colonial country where you grew up reading a lot of English story books you may encounter some really weird-sounding colloquial constructions in FL.
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Wriothesley: Call me "Risley". My first character, around midgame
Asesina Ballenas: whale killer. Alt, recently PoSI
Happy to accept most social actions; will help with menace reduction if it's reciprocated.
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malthaussen
Posts: 1060
12/8/2015
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"Charon"
Charon leaned forward and rowed. All things were one with his weariness.
It was not with him a matter of years or of centuries, but of wide floods of time, and an old heaviness and a pain in the arms that had become for him part of the scheme that the gods had made and was of a piece with Eternity.
If the gods had even sent him a contrary wind it would have divided all time in his memory into two equal slabs.
So grey were all things always where he was that if any radiance lingered a moment among the dead, on the face of such a queen perhaps as Cleopatra, his eyes could not have perceived it.
It was strange that the dead nowadays were coming in such numbers. They were coming in thousands where they used to come in fifties. It was neither Charon's duty nor his wont to ponder in his grey soul why these things might be. Charon leaned forward and rowed.
Then no one came for a while. It was not usual for the gods to send no one down from Earth for such a space. But the gods knew best.
Then one man came alone. And the little shade sat shivering on a lonely bench and the great boat pushed off. Only one passenger: the gods knew best. And great and weary Charon rowed on and on beside the little, silent, shivering ghost.
And the sound of the river was like a mighty sigh that Grief in the beginning had sighed among her sisters, and that could not die like the echoes of human sorrow failing on earthly hills, but was as old as time and the pain in Charon's arms.
Then the boat from the slow, grey river loomed up to the coast of Dis and the little, silent shade still shivering stepped ashore, and Charon turned the boat to go wearily back to the world. Then the little shadow spoke, that had been a man.
"I am the last," he said.
No one had ever made Charon smile before, no one before had ever made him weep.
(Lord Dunsany)
-- Mal
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"Of two choices, I always take the third."
Will do all socials except Loitering or Private Evenings (all my Free Evenings are accounted for), and Affluent Photographer Betrayals only, please. I am not currently accepting calling cards.
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/malthaussen
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Estelle Knoht
Posts: 1751
12/3/2015
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Cecil wrote:
OH, there is a typo, I think, the lack of commas I think.
It might supposed to be "You're, all of you, mine ni the end"
I Found A Typo
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Estelle Knoht, a juvenile, unreliable and respectable lady.
I currently do not accept any catbox, cider, suppers, calling cards or proteges.
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malthaussen
Posts: 1060
12/3/2015
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Because it is colloquial, the commas aren't used because that would be grafting rigorous grammar onto what is, essentially, dialect. "All of you" stands in place of simply "all." It's useful in poetry to add to the meter, and thus the commas also are omitted to not impede the flow.
-- Mal
edited by malthaussen on 12/3/2015
--
"Of two choices, I always take the third."
Will do all socials except Loitering or Private Evenings (all my Free Evenings are accounted for), and Affluent Photographer Betrayals only, please. I am not currently accepting calling cards.
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/malthaussen
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Lord Hoot
Posts: 47
12/3/2015
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This isn't a typo and it doesn't need a comma. It's a perfectly correct sentence, at least in British English.
Quoth E Nesbit:
"Then He would say, "I told you
The time I was here before,
That you were all of you brothers,
All you that I suffered for.
I won't go into your churches,
I'll stop in the sun outside.
You bring out the men your brothers,
The men for whom I died!""
edited by Lord Hoot on 12/3/2015
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Charlotte_de_Witte
Posts: 360
12/3/2015
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Plus as the poor chaps Swedish you might expect his English to sound a tad unusual?
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"Do one thing for me, Sredni Vashtar."
Social actions welcome. Only, send me dupes if you need help with the Affluent Photographer please, I like the bats! [And boxed kitties, and extreme gardening]- Thank-you!
http://fallenlondon.storynexus.com/Profile/Charlotte%20de%20Witte
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Diptych
Administrator
Posts: 3493
12/3/2015
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Per the in-game Help page, you can report typos to support@failbettergames.com! But, yes, I'd say this isn't a typo, just the Boatman using a slightly odd turn of phrase. We're all of us his in the end.
--
Sir Frederick, the Libertarian Esotericist. Lord Hubris, the Bloody Baron.
Juniper Brown, the Ill-Fated Orphan. Esther Ellis-Hall, the Fashionable Fabian.
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Erika
Posts: 528
12/3/2015
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OH, there is a typo, I think, the lack of commas I think.
It might supposed to be "You're, all of you, mine ni the end"
--
 Where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep.
Going on a fate expedition? I'm collecting data! Help me?
"Bottles of Oblivion" drunk in the name of content: 57
Catboxes (send more!) opened in the name of science: 1093
Fancy a friend?
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Kittenpox
Posts: 869
12/3/2015
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As for the subject itself, I think the sentence works as-is. (I can see how it reads better with commas, but as spoken the commas slow it down needlessly. If in doubt, speak the sentence in a pirate voice. It still flows smoothly, even if at first glance it doesn't appear to do so as text. ^_^ )
--
Kittenpox
Current [Fabulous Diamond] count: Twenty-Five (of 50). Halfway there! ^_^
Metaphysical Caprice: 11.
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Currently: Returned to the Neath, and regaining my footing in this place. :-)
NO PLANT BATTLES PLEASE.
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Guest
12/8/2015
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I never died, but met another extra-planetary traveler group, who claimed some odd Parabolaian future camps ownership or something, then laughed at a joke and took off?
Perhaps you can clarify?
edited by the truthseeker on 12/8/2015
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