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What is the etiquette re: Hallowmas confessions?
Kade Carrion (an_ocelot)
Posts: 1372
11/9/2015
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I am (cis) female, but I play as a character of mysterious etc., and for a while on the forums was deliberately not mentioning gender, but people always and only assumed I was male, so I eventually stopped.
Because the username & the icon aren't obviously gendered, I still had to put "don't assume I'm a dude!" notes into the Cider and Ambition: Enigma docs, though.
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Kittenpox
Posts: 869
11/9/2015
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On the topic of gender, I've found that using they/them/their has been a very good habit to have.
If you're talking to someone about a cis person with obvious gender, then their pronouns aren't terribly important. That guy over there's a dude. We know he's a 'he' without specifying it in dialogue. That lass over there would obviously be referred to as 'she', and nobody's going to suffer confusion or be terribly upset if I use non-gender-specific pronouns for her.
That, plus its saved me terrible embarrassment on a couple of occasions - and made it easier when in conversation with the few trans friends I have. It's been one of the few pay-offs that having a poor memory has given me. (I started using they/them because I'd draw blanks in conversation so even basic details would sometimes slip my mind. Not often, but often enough that overlooking gender was helpful as its one less thing to keep track of.)
As for Hallowmas, I managed to scrape to exactly 500 Spirit of Hallowmas. There were a few rejections and unanswered replies, which was disappointing - especially from those who had contacted me first rather than the other way around. And I had to reach out to some folks who hadn't contacted me towards the end there - so I apologise for spam to those folks (and to the ones I'd failed at keeping track of and had sent multiple requests.) There were a couple of sleepless nights, way more stress than I should have allowed myself to have, a fair bit of Fate expenditure to keep up with confession requests sent my way, and no small amount of my own sanity sacrificed for Hallowmas' sake... but I got there in the end.
Good times. :-D
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Kittenpox
Current [Fabulous Diamond] count: Twenty-Five (of 50). Halfway there! ^_^
Metaphysical Caprice: 11.
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Currently: Returned to the Neath, and regaining my footing in this place. :-)
NO PLANT BATTLES PLEASE.
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