I have reformatted the text to be visually smoother. I ended up using HTML tags to make it work. Let me know what you think. Any advice on formatting the text would be greatly appreciated.
I will work on the story line tomorrow during the day. I will be clearing up the intentions of the characters as well as adding a pre-story so the reader/player can have more information on whats going on.
I will also be working on making it apparent that the Aliens are appearing as the Divine because it suits their needs. Or I may take the “The Gods we know are actually Aliens” route. I think that may work best. Thoughts?
Updates that further the story line will take a while as what I have in the World so far is what I have written. I have a basic outline/story arc that I will work on fleshing out.
It’s 10:30 here and I have to be up for work nice and early. I will catch you all in the AM. edited by Subject30Nine on 10/23/2012
I am currently working on changing the story line to make sense, as well as establishing a world wide story line to give the reader/player more information on what is happening and why.
A few thoughts: A very basic tool of writing to engage an audience is to show, not tell. The intro card is a lot of telling, like a marquee slide of text or a voiceover before a movie. Yes, it gets across the information we need to proceed, but with some more work, you could rewrite that intro into a piece that has players doing things, finding out things on their own. That’ll be a lot more interesting and engaging.
Fundamentally, this format is different from a novel (and yeah, I had some fun weeks of learning curve and editing on that one -_- ), and if your story doesn’t involve choices, branches, maybe ask yourself - why this format? How can I use this format to improve my story, and how does my storytelling need to change to take advantage of these tools?
[quote=Becca Noe]A few thoughts: A very basic tool of writing to engage an audience is to show, not tell. The intro card is a lot of telling, like a marquee slide of text or a voiceover before a movie. Yes, it gets across the information we need to proceed, but with some more work, you could rewrite that intro into a piece that has players doing things, finding out things on their own. That’ll be a lot more interesting and engaging.
Fundamentally, this format is different from a novel (and yeah, I had some fun weeks of learning curve and editing on that one -_- ), and if your story doesn’t involve choices, branches, maybe ask yourself - why this format? How can I use this format to improve my story, and how does my storytelling need to change to take advantage of these tools?[/quote]
First off, I LOVE Zero Summer. :)
Secondly, I agree. I was tossing around the idea of having a few alternate story line choices for the player to follow. I would love to make the intro card into an interactive story but I’m not entirely sure where to start and what POV to write it from. :/
Ultimately I want to get my story line straight and consistent before I start to add in the interactivity. However, my goal is to provide an interactive world that allows the player to really get into the universe I’m creating.