Celebrating the 100th Exceptional Story!

Required Repairs

Wherein the Town Council reveals their true intentions: to foreshadow Sunless Skies!

Caveat Emptor

It’s <!--Player_Character-->!
Welcome to
A Sanguine Château,
𝖉𝖊𝖑𝖎𝖈𝖎𝖔𝖚𝖘 𝖑𝖔𝖉𝖌𝖊𝖗!

1 Like

This is not funny! (and thank you for that)
//lies down and starts crying//

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Some latest stories definitely lack this feature!

Cut with Moonlight

Sunlight kills. Moonlight merely bleeds.

And stings a little.

Okay, a lot. Ow. Where’s the carbolic?

2 Likes

SALON SCANDAL!

Look! Under the bed!
There crawls a bat-wing’d spider
And it’s tentacled!

The Frequently Deceased

“Ugh, Charles, did you kill your nanny again? You can’t keep doing this! We’ll have to give hazard pay!”

The Pursuit of Moths

Good news for people who like the Bishop of Saint Fiacre’s! Ordinary people do have a chance with waxier folks!

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Daylight

I can only assume that you’ll be Dead By the end.

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The Bloody Wallpaper

The job market’s not that bad, is it? At least you’ll be paid well, I assume?

…Oh. And the benefits…? I see. I’m sorry I brought it up.

2 Likes

The Price of Loss

Come one, come all, to the Therapy Tent! Oh wait, you wanted to get some therapy? No, your job is giving it. Now get in that mirror.

My Kingdom for a Pig

Higgledy-piggledy,
Dr. Fungiphily
heard London rhyming and
opted to dig

down five mycelial
antelapsarian
stories, for truffles to
feed to a pig.

(With thanks to Optimatum and Agent Artemis for poetry workshopping!)

3 Likes

Cricket, Anyone?

Imbibing, Mr. Wines
On its grace as host opines
But forced to recall its reign
A stain.

2 Likes

Ooo, lovely clerihew. I do love a good clerihew.

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The Ballad of Johnny Croak

Hippity hoppity,
Johnny takes vengeance for
mistreated workers, the
urchins all gloat.

But his true motive is
biodiversity—
that’s why he keeps all the
frogs in his coat.

4 Likes

So…, I know that the competition is closed, but is there any word on when the results will be released?

Hey! There are hundreds of entries so it’ll take a few days :slight_smile:

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Do I get credit for a Discordance entry by not entering? ;)

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Congratulations! You may already be a winner in the Discordant Sweepstakes! The winning non-entrant will be awarded no prize!

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In the end it took much longer for everyone to respond to my notifications that they’d one (and I’m even waiting on one person still) so here are the winning entries!

Flame, Lead, Clay, Glass:
Enemies to lovers, slow burn.

The Sinking Synod:
Brawling bishops bicker bitterly and biblically over blemmigan- and bolete-filled bogland. Back a bloc, bring balance by becoming a bogus Bishop, or belay the business and befriend the bothered Bugsby.

The Bloody Wallpaper:
I want to talk to the Manager.

The Final Curtain:
While playing this story, I learned what a fontanelle is, and immediately regretted learning what a fontanelle is.

My Kingdom for a Pig:
There’s a wine-plague of impromptu verse
When the pig arrives things become worse
Then you gatecrash an auction
For a milky decoction
And discover some mold needs a hearse.

Go Tell The King of Cats:
A feline with only one purrpose: to sleep, purrchance to dream.

Codename: Sugarplum:
My dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog have no lovely ski trip.

14 Likes